And the award for ‘Most Gut-Wrenching Depreciation Suffered By An Early 2000s Sports Car’ goes to… the Mazda RX-8! Speech! Speech! Speeeeeech!

Oh, he’s gone to the bar for a top-up. The crazy bastard drinks like he’s at Shane McGowan’s wake.

Alcoholism aside (and partly thanks to the drink habit), the RX-8 thoroughly deserves its depreciation award. Because while £5,000 Honda S2000s and £6,000 Nissan 350Zs are wallet-twitchingly tempting, the Mazda RX-8’s value has dropped quicker than a D-lister’s knickers. You can now buy an RX-8 for LESS THAN £3,000. Why on earth wouldn’t you?

Well, inevitably, we’re back at fuel consumption. The RX-8’s fizzy Wankel engine might rev to the moon and give you the other-worldly thrill of not having pistons, but even driving sensibly on a middle-lane motorway run, you won’t break 30mpg – around town, you won’t even do 20. Even in Mazda’s own pictures, the RX-8 is barely a quarter full…

Its reputation for oil use is similarly deserved, although perhaps not as petrifying. As the oily bits of the engine aren’t separated from the exploding bits by piston rings or such rubber-sealy goodness, the oil gets burnt. It was all part of Mr Wankel’s design – and other than being annoying, is nothing to worry about. Check the level every-other time you fill up (so, quite often), and expect consumption of no more than 1 litre per 1,500 miles.

Anything else to be aware of? Well, yes. Mr Wankel’s rotary engine doesn’t like cold starts – the RX-8’s instruction manual even tells you to not switch off the engine unless it’s had time to reach temperature. While you’re all intelligent enough to follow this advice, previous owners may not have been – so cars with incredibly low mileage that never reached temperature aren’t necessarily good news. Make sure you ask the owner if they do lots of short trips.

At the other end of the spectrum, make sure the car starts when it’s warm – if it struggles, the problem could be anything from coil packs to spark plugs to a dodgy starter motor or low compression. Hot starting problem = not a good one.

But other than avoiding short journeys, tolerating the fuel consumption, checking the oil and making sure it starts when hot, the RX-8 handles and thrusts well enough to be a pleasure to own. If you can ignore the handbrake, which always looks like it needs adjusting and gets in the way when changing gear. Bloody RHD conversions.

Now you know the basics, you can choose between the 192 and 231bhp versions – and it’s not as simple as just going for the gruntier one. The 192bhp version actually has a smidge more torque (162lb ft versus 156) and a 5-speed gearbox to the pokier version’s 6-speed, giving it a slightly longer legged gait. It’s best to ignore the power and just buy on condition, history and the geeky enthusiasm of the owner.

So. The RX-8 does demand more of you than a barrel chested 350Z or ballet loving S2000, but handles just as well and costs over £2,000 less. It’s got to be the sportscar bargain of the year – and just think how many Nectar points you’ll get from your local BP.

It’s the time of year when the world’s men-folk indulge in one of their Top 5 Favourite Activities – making and reading lists. So as a Christmas present to you loyal reader(s), we’re going to write a list all of our own. Lady and Man, we present The Top Five Cars We’ve Driven in 2010.

5. Mitsubishi Evo X FQ400

When we bagged the keys to Mitsubishi’s window-licking hyper-saloon, we were immediately stunned. This wasn’t just a creaky jap-box being kept alive with a huge iron lung of a turbo, but an incredibly well set-up and easy to drive weapon. Even in the hands of ham-fisted amateurs like ourselves, it danced, whooshed, raced and destroyed. Simultaneously flattering and brutal.

Yes it looks daft, has a tacky interior, costs £50k and won’t do 20mpg – but that’s why it’s only at number 5. For being brilliant as well as preposterous, the Fahk-You-400 makes the list.
Read our original review here.

4. Citroen DS3

Not long ago, Citroen showrooms resembled branches of Lidl – cheap stock piled high to shift quick. To mums and dads after a bargain C4 Picasso, it was great. But everybody else wanted to shop in Waitrose. Which is where the DS3 came in.

Suddenly, Citroen had a posh little car that was genuinely desirable instead of apologetically affordable. The styling was sharp and different, the engines were consistently strong and even the chassis could flick its skirt like a saucy French maid. To our senses, it doesn’t quite match the dynamic ability of a Mini… but in every other respect, it’s better. One of very few new cars we’d actually buy with real-life monies.

Read our original review here.

3. Skoda Superb Estate

The car that took Skoda from plucky underdog to class-leader. While the previous Superb never quite had the gumption to live up to its name, this one wears it with pride. You know the bullied kid at school who goes away for a year, comes back buff and kicks the giblets out of everyone? That’s the Superb. Only it’s far less angry.

Priced from less than £18k, you get the second biggest boot of any estate car in the UK (only beaten by the Merc E-Class), a faultless interior, the best of VW’s current engines and more rear leg-room than anything this side of a Rolls Phantom. It ticks boxes that don’t even exist. There’s even a brolly in the door.
Read our original review here.

2. Honda CR-Z

Shock! ‘The World’s First Sporty Hybrid’© actually is! But strangely, most of its endearing features have little to do with the combination of electricity and combustion under its skin. What stands out for us is the design and engineering that have gone into making it fun to drive.

A snicky six speed manual gearbox. A rorty-on-request exhaust note. Beautifully judged spring and damper settings. A sci-fi-tastic digital hub of a dashboard. Grip and balance that are tweakable on the road. An 80s wedge shape that also nods to the obligatory eco-car steam iron aesthetic. A super-strong chassis with the torsional rigidity of a Civic Type-R. The CR-Z is an incredibly well resolved little car. That it’s cheaper than a Scirocco, C-Charge exempt, costs peanuts to tax and is as economical as a stodgy diesel is a bonus.
Read our original review here.

1. Ford Focus RS500

By far the most memorable car we’ve driven this year, and not just because we drove 800 miles in 24 hours. It’s impossible to imagine how the RS500 shovels on speed until you’ve driven one – we’d swear that only an M3 or 911 Carrera upwards would be able pull away. Extra brownie points are awarded for its ability to achieve such fierce levels of acceleration while maintaining the standard RS’s gloriously granular steering and sweetly weighted controls.

The RS500 is a heart-on-the-sleeve working class hero… it’s carrying a bunch of flowers while beating someone up with beer barrel biceps. How Ford made a £35,000, FWD, 345bhp hatchback quite so appealing is a mystery. But they have.

And there’s a bigger reason to pay respect too. The RS500 marks the end of an era for all the gloriously kinky cars that are being killed because they don’t meet the Euro V emissions regulations: Mazda RX-8, Honda Civic Type-R, VW V10 TDI Touareg and Alfa Romeo 3.2 V6 – it’s a swan song for all of them. Instead of seeming like an over-specced Essex spacker-hatch designed to make some chavs have a wank, it feels like a little chunk of automotive history. It’s etched into our minds… there’s just something about it that gives it an air of importance. A moment in time.

So while Ford could have given the bonkers Focus RS a bolt-gun to the head and packed it off quietly, they didn’t. They made it more powerful, more expensive and more memorable – and that’s why it’s top of the list. Respeck.

Read our original review here.

Honda commissioned some London types to make a promo video for the CR-Z, so off they went with a box of Wilco lasers and a Handycam. This is what they made. Looks cool, shame about the soft-core music.

Can you make a carrot taste meaty? Think about it – because it’s a tough and incredibly pertinent question. Would you even want to? Aren’t carrots and meat better off in harmonious, balanced diet co-existence? Or would life be easier if you could get a meat hit and vegetably goodness from one crunchy stick? It’s a tricky one. And so is the new Honda CR-Z… because it throws up the exact same quandary.

Honda call their new coupe the world’s first ‘sporty hybrid’ – a juxtaposition of words just as awkward as ‘meaty carrot’. At the £16k to £20k price level of the CR-Z, hybrids have always been about economy, economy and a little bit more economy. Very much carrot cars. So, has adding some sporty meat diluted the purity of the carrot or made it a more widely desirable dish? Is it good?

Against all odds, yes. As long as you manage your expectations. The engine, for instance is very much carrot – a 1.5 litre, 112bhp version of the Insight’s 1.3 petrol unit, which together with the Insight’s 14bhp electric motor can muster a peak of 122bhp. Which gives the CR-Z the performance of a car that isn’t fast.

But thanks to a grunty exhaust note and decent 128lb ft wedge of torque from a low 1,500rpm, it still feels meaty enough to call itself sporty – and the 9.9 sec 0-62mph time sits well with the combined 56mpg and 117g/km of CO2. Only just squeezing under the 10 second 0-62mph mental block might sound weak, but let’s get back to the CR-Z’s price again – it’s at entry level Scirocco and mid-spec Volvo C30 money. Of the three S, Sport and GT trims, Honda expect the £18k Sport to sell the best – an £18k Scirocco 1.4 TSI is just two tenths quicker to 62mph, but 10mpg worse off. The Scirocco TDI is £3k more, half a second quicker but no more economical. An £18k Volvo 2.0SE will crack 62mph in 9.4 secs but won’t even do 40mpg.

It all adds up to an enticing package for real life humans who want a rorty sound, angular metal and a decent chance of not being forced into poverty at every BP visit. Honda have clearly worked hard on giving it a proper exhaust note too.

It’s a similar menu of well-judged finesse for the chassis – a lower, stiffer and wider version of what you’ll find under the body of a Jazz supermini or Insight hybrid. The forgiving, easy nature of the Jazz is tangible, but bolstered with a keener to turn, sharper attitude. Carrot shaped Jazz with beefed up geometry. There isn’t an endless meaty bucket of grip, or an overdone attitude to firmness and roll control – just an intelligent balance between fleet footed fun and soft edged compliance.

The alertness of the Scirocco is missing, but so is the occasionally crashy ride, while it both corners and cossets better than the C30. You just can’t quite shake off the feeling that an extra 30bhp would transform it from incredibly enjoyable to proper fun. There’s always the rumoured Mugen version…

What it does better than either Scirocco or C30 is look a little bit special, inside and out. The first glimpse most people had of the CR-Z was at the Detroit Motor Show last year, where it seemed under-wheeled, awkwardly angled and slightly bulbous around the bonnet. In the flesh, on the streets, it now looks spot on. And it gets better on the inside. Some of the plastics that make up the lower half of the dash feel like they’d crack on a sunny day, but the top half and touch points all feel posh enough, with a genuinely fresh feeling to the design and layout. The decently snicky 6-speed manual (the first time such a box has been bolted onto a hybrid powertrain) deserves mention too. Meaty, but not erm… too fatty or stodgy. Hmm.

So, there’s just enough meat to the way it sounds, corners and goes to justify Honda’s apparently contradictory placement of the word ‘sporty’ next to the word ‘hybrid’. This carrot got meat. And, bizarrely, all of the hybrid electronics actually add to this sporty feel – not just in the way that the electric motor pushes you along with a hint of turbo like torque, but in the way the workings of the powertrain are presentered to the driver. There are three driving modes; Normal, Eco and Sport, all of which feature their own mini-technicolour dash show and appropriate dynamic tweaks.

In Sport mode, the throttle response is sharper, steering weightier, electric motor more keen to assist and instrument binnacle light a constant red. Hit normal and the throttle softens off, steering eases up, electric motor holds itself back and the instruments glow to reflect your driving style – green is good, blue adequate and red bad (otherwise known as fast). Eco mode softens things up so far as to be offensive and even weakens the car’s air con to keep fuel efficiency up. As well as the mood glowing lights, the CR-Z also shows five LED trees which either shed or grow leaves depending on your driving. Trying to make them all fall off as quickly as possible is clearly the best game to play, but attempting to nurture them back again does at least provide the opportunity for fun when you’re not driving like a robber.

These little gimmicks help you realise you’re not just driving a slightly underpowered coupe – you’re driving a car that lets you choose between class-beating economy and class matching performance. Instead of questioning whether you can make a carrot taste meaty, or how much the world really needs one, the CR-Z has a wide enough spread of talents to let you just accept it for what it is – a good value, fun to drive, comfortable and smartly resolved coupe. It might not look great on the menu, but Honda have made the world’s first meaty carrot. Very well done.

Digesting the news… then spewing it out in 60 words

Volkswagen announced a new in-house performance brigade, Volkswagen R GmbH, who’ll make their quick cars. Vauxhall introduced new threadbare ‘Expression’ and ‘ES’ spec levels to its range, dropping starting prices by up to £3,675. Honda announced the recall of 412,000 cars in America because of ‘soft brakes’. And there were more suggestions that the drink-drive limit could be lowered.

Sweaty Palms

Digesting the news… then spewing it out in 60 words

Honda made hot hatch fans sigh, with the Civic Type R Mugen – all the visual glitz of the 240bhp Mugen Type R, but only the standard 198bhp output. ‘Lotus’ revealed their new F1 car, which will be driven by Trulli and Kovalainen. And Citroen showed off their pretty DS High Rider Concept, showing what the imminent DS4 will look like.

Seems that during the last decade, Japanese manufacturers weren’t being as tight with the QC as they’d have us believe. In the last few days, both Honda and Toyota have recalled enormous quantities of motors to make sure they’re not going to drive off randomly or catch fire. And, because of the shared platforms of the Toyota Aygo, Citroen C1 and Peugeot 107, PSA had to call some back too. Seeing as it’s all over the news and people are getting in a bit of a tizz, we thought we’d do the sensible thing and put all the recall details in one place:

Toyota

The problem

Certain accelerator pedal mechanisms may, in rare instances, mechanically stick in a partially depressed position or return slowly to the idle position.

The symptom

Car gets faster when you don’t really want it to.

The solution

1.8 million cars across Europe are being recalled, to have a strengthening plate fitted to the accelerator mechanism that stops it from sticking.

Affected cars:

Aygo (Feb 2005 – Aug 2009)

iQ (Nov 2008 – Nov 2009)

Yaris (Nov 2005 – Sep 2009)

Auris (Oct 2006 – 5 Jan 2010)

Corolla (Oct 2006 – Dec 2009)

Verso (Feb 2009 – 5 Jan 2010)

Avensis (Nov 2008 – Dec 2009)

RAV4 (Nov 2005 – Nov 2009)

Toyota will contact all customers effected, but if you want to pester them call Toyota GB Customer Relations on 0800 1388 744. The parts needed for the fix are expected to arrive in the UK early next week, with customers being contacted at around the same time.

Honda

The problem

Electric window switches may short circuit if exposed to water.

The symptom

The electric window switch catches fire.

The solution

A global recall of 646,000 Jazz’s, 171,372 of which are from the UK, to either have a new electric window switch fitted or a waterproof skirt fitted to the current one.

Affected cars

Honda Jazz 2001 – 2008.

Citroen and Peugeot

The problem

The Citroen C1 and Peugeot 107 are made in the same Czech factory as the Toyota Aygo and could suffer the same sticking accelerator.

The symptom

Accidentally starting a race with a Toyota Aygo.

The solution

PSA are recalling up to 100,000 C1s and 107s to have the same modifications to their accelerator mechanisms as the Toyota Aygo.

Affected cars

All Peugeot 107s and Citroen C1s.

So now you know.

Digesting the news… then spewing it out in 60 words

Toyota announced a pedal reinforcing remedy to the 1.8million European cars it’s recalling for sticking accelerator pedals, Peugeot and Citroen confirmed they’re recalling C1s and 107s to fix the same problem and Honda recalled the Jazz from 2001-2008 to fix a dodgy electric window switch. Meanwhile, F1 cars were testing in Valencia, with Schumacher being quicker than his teammate Rosberg.

Go to a pub, banter with your car-brained mates, have a few beers, play some darts… then tell them that buying a Honda Insight is a thoroughly excellent idea. It’d be like suggesting they eat a Falafel salad with low fat mayo instead of pork scratchings. But their scepticism is wrong… and it’s your duty to talk them round.

First, recite some trivia. It’s still the most economical hybrid ever made. They’ll no doubt laugh, so tell them it’s made from aluminium. Probably won’t care about that either. So change tactic and frame the car as a two-seat, lightweight coupe with faired in wheels which are obviously the coolest things in the world. That’ll get them really laughing – but you’ll have their attention. So keep going.

Brag about the Insight’s long range and light weight. 85mpg on a 40 litre tank means you can go over 700 miles without stopping. Girls will suddenly be interested. The men will be jealous. While the 69bhp 3-cylinder 1.0l engine might sound limp, it will crack 62mph in about 11 secs with the help of the 10kw motor. Considering the long economy biased gear ratios (over 70mph in 2nd…) that’s not bad. And at just 820kg, it should drive with some degree of flightiness too.

With interest vaguely bubbling, hook them in with the fact that a mk1 Insight can cost less than £5k. You’ll never pay any congestion charging, and if you buy one that’s registered after March 2001, you won’t pay any road tax either. Even a pre-2001 early model will only cost £65 a year. When the Insight first came to Britain in 2000, it cost £16k and in the three years it was available, only sold a couple of hundred – so it’ll make the dowdy pub folk look unique and interesting as a bonus.

Servicing costs are pretty standard for a Honda too. The oil needs changing every 7,500 miles so look for proof of that, but they’re generally very well looked after. The battery has a warranty of 8 years or 80,000 miles, which is more than likely to be expired – but problems are rare and the lifespan is generally around 150,000 miles if driven normally. In the worst-case scenario, a new battery pack will cost a couple of grand but can be refurbed for around £500. If you’re a real hardcore hybrid high miler, you’ll want the factory fit Bridgestone B391 tyres too, which are worth a few extra mpg – 120mpg has been known.

Best not to go into details about tyre choice and oil servicing in the pub though – your mates are probably a bit pissed by this point anyway. It’s the perfect time to whip out the final tool in the Insight buying arsenal – increased beer money. Just show them how much more London Pride they could afford thanks to all the tax, congestion and petrol that wouldn’t need to be paid for. Save the world, get girls, drink beer… drive an Insight. Just never use the word hypermiling at the bar.

5. BMW 1 Series Concept ActiveE

An electric BMW 1 Series. The Mini E is all well and good, but with batteries robbing it of back seats, it’s not going to be popular with people who’ve got more than one friend. The electric 1 Series, however, has four seats…

Because it’s rear wheel drive, the electric motor is mounted in the back axle as opposed to up front. This frees up bonnet space, which is used in conjunction with the usual fuel tank space to store batteries… instead of having to put them in place of the back seats like in the Mini E. With 170bhp and 184lb ft of torque, it’ll do 0-62mph in 9 seconds, has a 100 mile quoted range and limited top speed of 90mph. Just like the Mini, it’ll be leased out to UK customers – you’ll have to pay around £500 a month and there’s likely to be a big queue.

4. Toyota FT-CH

A Toyota Prius Coupe. It sounds like a horrendous concept, and we’re still not convinced that hybrids are the future – but if we have to have them, they may as well be interesting. Call it a sporty stop-gap. Production isn’t confirmed, but with Toyota open about wanting to extend the Prius model to a whole family of hybrids, it looks likely.

The FT-CH is a couple of feet shorter than the Prius, and Toyota claim that it would also be cheaper, lighter and sportier… if it goes into production. We’ll just have a random guess – how about a plug-in Prius Coupe by the end of 2013?

3. Honda CR-Z

Another hybrid coupe… but this one’s going on sale in the summer. It’s based on the Insight, which means that unlike the Prius or the possible FT-CH, it won’t be able to run purely on electric power at low speeds. The Insight chassis has had its wheelbase shortened and track widened to help the CR-Z handle decently, and the CR-Z is 50kg lighter than the car on which it’s based. Although, seeing as it’s a 2 seater, that’s no surprise.

The petrol engine is a 1.5 litre compared to the Insight’s 1.3, but 102bhp still doesn’t sound great – even when working alongside the electric motor, total output is just 122bhp. Performance figures haven’t been released yet, but it emits 117g/km of CO2 and should do 56.4mpg. We’ve ranked it higher than the FT-CH because it’s the first to arrive, but we’ll put a pound on the Toyota being the smarter car…

2. Audi e-tron

An electric TT. The e-tron was originally shown at the Frankfurt show last year – generally seen as an electric vision of the R8 supercar. This second version has shrunk to become smaller than a TT – which has helped the weight drop by a quarter of a tonne, to 1390kg. It’s also now rear wheel drive, instead of four wheel drive.

The battery and motor layout is very similar with two motors and a wedge of batteries sitting between the driver and the back wheels. Power is 200bhp and torque a ball-rupturing 1954lb ft: 0-62mph happens in 5.9 seconds and there’s a theoretical range of 150 miles. A much, much more realistic prospect than the original… and nearly 2000lb ft of torque through the back wheels? Make it please.

1. Ford Focus

An essential car for Ford, the UK and the globe. This mk3 Ford Focus will go on sale across the whole world – so it needs to be ruddy amazing. While local tweaks will be made to suit each market, Ford are hoping that global tastes have converged to such an extent that one car fits all: it’s going on sale in 122 countries, with 80% of the car common to all of them.

The new Focus hits the UK in early 2011 – the same time as America and the rest of Europe. We’ll get a new 1.6 turbo charged engine, improved Duratorq diesels, an interior with a focus on quality and a chassis gently tweaked to suit our picky ways. In time, the Focus chassis will spawn saloons, estates, MPVs and crossovers – Ford expect to shift 2 million units a year by 2012. A plague of Focus… it’s biblically important.

Digesting the news… then spewing it out in 60 words

The Delhi Motor Show kicked off, with manufacturers displaying concept cars for ‘emerging markets’. Toyota had the Etios, which goes on sale later this year. Honda’s rival had a working title of ‘New Small Concept’. And Tata showed off their Aria crossover. Worryingly, none of them promised to be much greener than the Tata Nano – so we’re all going to die.

Yes, we know it’s now Monday so this is old news… but we went to the pub on Friday and have only just left. So, for the sake of continuity, here’s Friday’s news on Monday:

Digesting the news… then spewing it out in 60 words

Some Formula 1 news happened: Renault sold 75% of its team to an unnamed buyer, keeping 25% for itself; and the points system was changed with 25 points for 1^st place, down to 1 point for 10^th. There were rumours of Kia making a rear-drive coupe, based on the Hyundai Genesis. And pictures of Honda’s CR-Z leaked onto the internet.

Digesting the news… then spewing it out in 60 words

The LA Auto Show opened. VW showed their Up! Lite concept, a four seat, 96mpg, 800cc diesel hybrid. Honda displayed the P-NUT concept – a 1+2 seater for city types. Porsche announced they’ll make a hybrid Panamera in 2011. Chevrolet’s electric Volt will be on sale in California in 2011. Elsewhere, GM President Fritz Henderson stepped down at the company’s request.

Today in 60 words… it’s all you need to read.

Assuming the world was still recoiling from the LF-A’s price, Mugen announced the price of their spat on Civic Type-R – £39k, or two Sciroccos. Mercedes persuaded 30 more horses into the C63 AMG’s barn for a mere £7k. And the swarm of future-gazing micro-electric cars released at the Tokyo motor show was increasing in size and becoming bloody tedious.

Never ask anyone whether or not they think hybrid cars are a good idea. The response will go through 360 degrees of nonsense, settle on ‘well, if that’s what you’re into’, then spear off on a tangent about falafal and quinoa. Are they intelligent examples of eco-engineering? Cynical marketing wagons designed to earn a green brand halo? Common sense stop-gaps before internal combustion goes the way of the steam engine?

To avoid this quagmire and judge whether or not the new Honda Insight makes sense, you need to sidestep all the technology. It doesn’t matter how well designed the insulating tape is, how impressively it manages to avoid catching fire, or even how many engines it’s got – invisible technology isn’t enough to make people open their purse.

The new Honda Insight just needs to be cheap, frugal, comfy and stylish – a bit like a diesel hatchback, but better. Also, because Toyota’s rival Prius is seen as the hybrid pioneer (despite the Insight mk1 actually going on sale a year earlier), it needs to be better than one of those too.

Let’s get down to the green that really matters; money. When the Insight goes on sale it will cost around £15,000, making it at least £2,000 cheaper than the boggiest Prius. It’s also within 2mpg of the Prius’ combined cycle and 5mpg better than the Toyota on the urban cycle, at 61.4 – that’s what economists call less expensive to buy and run, so it wins.

But when you start comparing the Insight to proper diesel hatchbacks, even the super-economy BrownMotion derivatives, plain old money doesn’t seem persuasive enough. The Honda’s main problem is that it feels exactly like a cheap Japanese hatchback that’s been built down to a price.

It starts with that crappy staple of all cars not made in Europe – plastic. It’s not a bad colour, doesn’t smell, creak or look like it was made in Tandy, but the scratchy and brittle surfaces fail to live up to the sparklingly modern skin on the outside.

If you hit the dashboard of a Golf with a rubber mallet, you’d expect a muted thud before it bounced off – do the same in an Insight and you’d smash a hole through it. Although, smashing a hole through the over-buttoned and fiddly stereo/sat nav/Amstrad computer thing wouldn’t be the end of the world, as you’d then have good reason to buy a new one that wasn’t stupid.

On the road, the unforgiving Japanese tactility continues – although here there are payoffs. The ride is less refined than a Prius or Golf, but instead of it feeling brittle, you get the impression that it’s been deliberately engineered. The upside is taut handling with steering that’s communicative enough to stop you from loathing being at the helm of such a green wagon – it can’t match the agility of a Ford Focus but still eggs you on to drive enthusiastically. Which is when you’ll encounter the Insight’s most persuasive piece of new technology…

An eco-psycologist lives inside the dashboard, coaching you on the best way to protect the climatic well-being of your children. If you drive like a bank-robber, 5 little trees on the display start to lose their leaves – they’ve each got two in total, and once they’re gone you have to drive super carefully to earn them back. I was genuinely too scared to see what happened if all the leaves fell off. And if that wasn’t enough, the speedo will glow a dark moody blue if you’re burning too much petrol, fading to friendly green if you’re careful.

With features like that, it’d be fairly easy to nurture a very severe hatred for such a patronising car – but in reality, such gimmicks tie the Insight together as enjoyably interactive. And, while the 1.3 litre 87bhp petrol engine and 14bhp electric motor are never going to tear your scalp off (especially with the moaning CVT box), Honda have ensured the motor’s low-rev flexibility and throttle response are subtle enough to allow pleasantly nuanced control.

With such subtlety and the natty computer game trees, the Insight is actually more fun to drive slowly than it is quickly – which, unlike a Prius, gives the Insight a purpose. Talking about driver involvement will usually involve cars like the Lotus Elise and Porsche Cayman – but to normal humans, the Insight is actually more involving than either of them.

You don’t care about the 12.5 second 0-62mph run, or 113mph top speed – the only benchmark you want to achieve is a beautiful example of topiary from your five computer trees and 60mpg after some equally detailed trimming of your throttle inputs.

Ultimately, the Insight doesn’t do that well at being an economical family car – it’s not classy, refined or fast enough to give a diesel Focus or Golf anything to worry about. By those rules, it fails Honda’s mission to bring hybrids into the aspirations of normal families. Basically, if your mum sat in it she wouldn’t like it and, therefore, wouldn’t let your dad buy it.

But, because it’s started a little rule-book all of its own about green motoring, driver involvement and the cost of hybrid technology, it’s become the first hybrid to actually have a point. It’s not just a piece of technology to argue over, it’s a technology to interact, play and have clean green fun with. OK, so adding some LCD trees to a diesel Focus would ultimately create a higher quality car with just as much sense – but the Insight is an effective enough eco-bully to mark it out as something interesting and worthwhile. If that’s what you’re into.