In the UK, today is the longest day of the year – so, purely because today is the only day long enough to enjoy them all, we’ve compiled a list of the most protracted, long winded car names ever. Take a deep breath and prey the sun’s still up when you’re done…
5. Toyota Estima Lucida G Luxury Joyful Canopy
An example from the country that gave the world such gems as the Mazda Bongo Friendee, the Mitsubishi ‘MUM 500 Shall We Join Us?’ and the Suzuki Every Joy Pop Turbo. In the UK and America, this Toyota MPV is called the Previa – but in its domestic market of Japan that’s obviously not descriptive enough. Although, seeing as the Estima Lucida G Luxury Joyful Canopy isn’t particularly luxurious or joyful, we’re not sure quite what the name is describing. At least the Canopy bit is vaguely accurate – it refers to the big glass roof.
4. Land Rover Range Rover Sport Limited Autobiography Supercharged
Ah, yes – the Range Rover. It’s made by Land Rover. And this is the lower, tighter Sport model. In top spec Autobiography trim. With a supercharger. Despite the vast array of badges weighing it down, the LR RR SLAS can crack 62mph in 5.9 seconds thanks to the V8 motor’s 503bhp and 461lb ft of torque. It’ll cost you though – the £70,540 starting price works out at £1,259 per letter.
3. Lamborghini Murcielago LP670-4 Super Veloce China Limited Edition
The self explanatory name was obviously chosen by a primary school teacher who’s really good at teaching children to spell phonetically. Just like the teacher will say Lam Bor Gee Nee, Lambo themselves simply spelt out the name by listing its constituent elements. So it’s a Murcielago, it’s got 670PS, it’s got 4 wheel drive, it’s the 100kg lighter super fast model, and it’s a Limited Edition model for China. Only 10 were made, all in the same colour scheme, and all sold to Chinese customers.
2. Rolls-Royce Silver Spur II Touring Limousine by Mulliner Park-Ward
The standard Silver Spur II, released in 1989, was 5.4 metres long – but for some customers even that didn’t allow them to be far enough away from the peasant-class driver. So specialist Rolls Royce coachbuilder Mulliner Park-Ward stepped in and lengthened the car by 60cm, allowing the cigar chomping passenger to sit a further 2 feet away from the chap in the hat up front. It’s so long that there’s enough room for a 10” CRT TV to be mounted in its own walnut cabinet in the middle of the passenger compartment. And the name’s long too. Obviously.
1. Chevrolet Corvette Silver Anniversary Indianapolis 500 Pace Car Replica
In 1978, Chevrolet released a special edition Corvette called the Silver Anniversary to celebrate the model’s 25th birthday. Pretty smart. The ‘Chevrolet Corvette Silver Anniversary’ is a bit of a mouthful, but it’s an important occasion so easily forgiven. However, that wasn’t the end of it. Because at the 1978 Indy 500, the pace car was a Corvette Silver Anniversary… and what respectable car company wouldn’t make a special edition to acknowledge that? Well, none – not even GM.
So, they slapped on some more silver paint, garnished it with a red pin stripe, bolted on a couple of spoilers and called it the Chevrolet Corvette Silver Anniversary Indianapolis 500 Race Car Replica. Which, as far as we know, is the longest car name ever – with a staggering 63 characters. Perhaps if GM hadn’t spent so much money on name badges 30 years ago, they’d be in less trouble now.
Thanks to various people who we stole pictures off without asking. If you want them back, just ask.